Today, I have a privilege of hosting Gudrun Frerichs, born in Germany, now living in New Zealand. I met Gudrun on-line, through a supportive Facebook writers’ group. Gudrun Frerichs, PhD, is a therapist and author of Delicious Love Forever: Recipes for Lasting, Loving Relationships.
Enjoy Gudrun’s post:
A Beautiful Mind
One of my favourite movies is ‘Beautiful Mind’ based on the life of John Nash, a Nobel Laureate of Economics. John Nash suffered from schizophrenia as is revealed later in the movie. Some of the characters he interacted with and who influenced him in significant ways were, as it turns out, figments of his imagination. They were not real, although he thought they were until towards the later part of the movie. He ended up living with the knowledge that some of the things he experienced were not real and at the end he turned towards his ‘imaginary’ friend and told him so.
I thought how similar John Nash’s experiences are to all people. Like him, we see and experience things that are not quite as they seem to us. Yet we treat them as if they were. We all live in the illusion that we see things clearly, but we never can and never will. It has to do with how we are built as human beings. Our expectation (Thought) projects out into the world – and we treat what we sense and perceive as if it is out there in our environment, really happening, independent from what we were doing. But that is an illusion. We have created it in the first place. (go to David Bohm for more in-depth discussion of Thought)
Bruce and Linda have been married for 10 years. Lately Linda has been withdrawn and Bruce thought something was wrong with their relationship. He looked back and could find lots of incidences that – in hindsight – he thought were signs of her having an affair. Her late nights at the office, her changed appearance, all pointed to him being right. He had suspected for some time that something was going on between her and her colleague Wayne, a young, successful, good looking lawyer who had joined the company 7 month ago. Yes, Bruce was pretty sure. In fact, so much so that he had become almost paranoid and acted in a way Linda called “the Spanish Inquisition,” cold, distant, and not at all like the easygoing guy she’d married.
Bruce didn’t want to hear that he had created the situation with his power of THOUGHT. “How else should I think about the situation?” – Just last night at the end of year party Linda and Wayne had danced very close and obviously had a great time. They burst out laughing several times. He couldn’t see that his own insecurities had kick-started his suspicions which then led to paranoid behaviour. He felt a mixture of suspicion, rejection, anger, depending on his current thoughts. And his feelings told him he was right. “I can feel it,” was his final statement. He didn’t know that his thoughts don’t tell him about what goes on around him. No, our thoughts tell us about the quality of our thoughts.
Buddha already claimed 2500 years ago that “All human suffering comes from thought.” How right he was. If we wouldn’t think we wouldn’t have any problems! Today we know that our thoughts are very untrustworthy when we are in a distressed state of mind. A small amount of data is taken in by our senses and processed by our personal mind using filters like history, upbringing, morals, values, fears, suspicions, dreams, and hopes. Like in the example of Bruce and Linda, Bruce’s thought were more about him than about the situation. They were a hallucination similar to John Nash’s schizophrenic bouts.
But Bruce’s example is not unique. We all make things up. Our thoughts are just that: made up things about a certain person or circumstances. We can’t do it any other way. Humans are incapable of seeing reality for what it is. Whatever we perceive, we ALWAYS interpret and add to it from our own personal ‘library’. The worse we feel, the more our thoughts escalate, the less trustworthy they are. It’s like trying to look through a steamed-up window.
When our thinking calms down and our mind is quiet, our ‘steamed-up window clears and our perception is less skewed. We are more likely to be in our default setting, our innate health, the setting where we are at peace with the world, and where we experience wisdom and common sense. We are ‘in the zone’ as some people call it.
How can we achieve to be more often in our innate health? Be more often secure in our default setting? You can find the answer to that important question in my next post: Re-Discover Innate Health) or in my new book Delicious Love Forever: Recipes for Lasting, Loving Relationships.
The need to love and be loved is in our DNA and yet many people struggle within their relationships. ‘Delicious Love Forever’ is filled with common sense, wisdom, and simple concepts based on the premises that we all create our own, personal reality through the 3 principles of Mind, Thought, and Consciousness. Following these, readers are encouraged to get in touch with their innate ability to create lasting, loving relationships. This is enhanced with some delicious recipes, and tackles at the same time the root cause for relationship problems. Solutions are offered people can easily try out for themselves. Indeed, a holistic ‘meal’ that feeds mind, body, and soul!
Gudrun Frerichs, PhD is a therapist, author, and life-long explorer of the mysteries of the human mind. She is retiring from mental health and trauma work and has published now her first book Delicious Love Forever. She is passionate about applying the Principles of Mind, Thought, and Consciousness, as formulated by the late Sydney Banks, not only to her books but also to everyday living situations. For more go to her website www.gudrunfrerichs.com
Award Winning Author Helena Kalivoda, writes books that are inspired by her Soul. She takes you on a spiritual journey that combines her experience, wisdom and your desire to know more about yourself into books that are a must have for your collection. Find out about Helena and her books at http://www.booksbyhelena.com. Check out her author’s page at http://www.amazon.com/author/helena-kalivoda.